One Run Closer

I feel like I have been in that dream where I am running but not going anywhere, that the fear I am trying to distance myself from is only bound to catch me, and theres not one thing I can do about it. 6 years ago, If I was to know the person I am today I would be in disbelief and shock that I gave up so many dreams, goals. Mostly I would be disappointed in myself.  But if I was able to tell myself of all those instances that lead me here I would hope that the younger me would see why the fear has always caught me, even when I was running. I don't talk about running now. I actually hate talking about it, I even actually dread when I see someone I know in the running community. When I see a running post on social media I scroll so fast past it I think my pointer finger has whiplash. But what I fear the most is "Have you been running?" "Hows your training going?" "What races do you have planned?". Those questions I can live with out. But how did I get