One Run Closer

I ALMOST completely erased my entire "One Run Closer" blog that I started back in early 2014, reading through all my past training, race goals and race recaps left me realizing how much I changed since I found this sport.  I decided to leave my blog be, after all in some moment of time what I wrote meant something significant to me. Even though so much has changed, I changed, it may be all those instances, all those injuries, all those jabs in life that made me who I am today. Moving forward, and looking to find something that will give me significance and a reason to feel the fire again and also keep me accountable and most importantly find mindfulness and joy in life and running again. I feel that I should go into depth of where I am coming from to explain why I am here. 8 years ago or more I was once wrote about being one of the best female ultra runners on the East Coast. Still to this day I never thought that as being true. Yes, I won ultras, claimed and brok

If you don't look off to the sides, bears aren't there.  If you don't focus so much on the trail infront of you, you don't see snakes...  Maybe that noise I just heard was just some other runner falling into rubbish or maybe it's a bear? Well no bear and no snakes sights during this event, which is a win in my eyes!  World's End Ultra Marathon.   Location: Worlds End State Park, Pennsylvania  Distance: 50k Elevation gain: 6200+ft Course conditions: Wet, Mud Nutrition: 2 liters water, 4 oz coke. Looking back at all the ultra marathons I have ran (over 30 finishes) closer to over 40 If you want to count the few DNFs and a few distance switches. Besides the point, out of 30+ ultras I have ran, Worlds End is the toughest, most challenging course I have come across for the 50k distance, and to make the race even more brutal, we ran it in a heat wave. Rewind to 2 weeks prior. I got an email that my name was selected off the waitlist to be a participant. I

Heeeeeellllllo! Again!  It's mee... I am alive!! Yes, it's been over 3 years since I posted in my blog, and that is only because MY ENTIRE LIFE kind of changed, and I haven't ran an ultra in over 3 YEARS! WHY? I can blame it on my fractures in my pelvis and femur, or my spondylolithesis, maybe my hypertension, or my iron deficiency, or my renal artery stenosis. But I won't, because health related, I was healthy, running off and on, even ran a Road Marathon and did pretty decent (3:11).  The fact that I didn't run an ultra marathon in over 3 years is because I was SCARED! Terrified.  Anyone can look up my Ultrasignup results and see how many ultras I have a DNS (did not start), I would register, pay the money and just not go, I would get beyond so worked up and the anxiety of stepping up to the start line would literally ruin me.  In the last 3 years, a lot has changed in my private life as well as in my running life. Being a competitive runner, having sponsors. I le

I feel like I have been in that dream where I am running but not going anywhere, that the fear I am trying to distance myself from is only bound to catch me, and theres not one thing I can do about it. 6 years ago, If I was to know the person I am today I would be in disbelief and shock that I gave up so many dreams, goals. Mostly I would be disappointed in myself.  But if I was able to tell myself of all those instances that lead me here I would hope that the younger me would see why the fear has always caught me, even when I was running. I don't talk about running now. I actually hate talking about it, I even actually dread when I see someone I know in the running community. When I see a running post on social media I scroll so fast past it I think my pointer finger has whiplash. But what I fear the most is "Have you been running?" "Hows your training going?" "What races do you have planned?". Those questions I can live with out. But how did I get

Leading into Iron Horse 50 Mile I had a goals of running 7:00/7:15. It was around mile 28 when I realized that was not going to happen. 85+* and 100% humidity will send you into the lonny bin, and I went in kicking and screaming!!! BUT FIRST,... wait what my first ultra distance in OVER A YEAR!?! 8 MONTHS of injuries. And just 3 months of training and I am out here running a 50 miler, how did this come about???? I definitely need to be in this loony bin! Someone get me on Meds quick! So, 2017 what a year that I learned to embrace injuries... ha, f$@k that. All that I embraced was Netflix bingeing I did. Let's just skip how awful 2017 was and let's focus on the present and the future... IRON HORSE 50 MILE So now I use 50 mile races as training runs? WTF? I felt pretty swell those first 28 miles, running 7:55/8:05 paces, I even remember crossing the 25 mile mark singing and doing the arm movements of "BYE BYE BYE". It was then I literally went bye bye bye, one minu

I remember my very last race before this past weekend, well a race I had to DNS (Did Not Start) very well. It was the Run for Red Pocono Marathon, in Pennsylvania, mid May 2017. I planned to make it  a mini vacation out of the race weekend because my family lives so very close by. It was to be my 12th Full Marathon, even though I've ran over 40 Ultra Marathons I was super excited to add on one more Marathon to my finishes. My training was going rather well and I was expecting to either PR (sub 3:02) or possibly even go sub 3 hours on a good day, this race is a pretty fast course and I remember from running it years prior that if you are smart on the down hills the inclines can be very forgiving. Well I did not get to even run this marathon, the day before I was suppose to take my flight to Scranton, Pa. I was at work and feeling very light headed, dizzy and almost about to collapse. I was dealing with Hypertension issues for a few months now and on meds to control it, but the meds